GYMTIMIDATION

Gymtimidated-

When someone is intimidated to go to the gym (or use gym equipment) because the muscle heads are constantly using the weight machines/free weights..or any other reason not listed above.

Example sentence: Caitlin was going to go lift weights today but was  gymtimidated.

Think you're the only one with this issue? Think again.. this problem is huge..all over the world and if you think that Arnold and Dana B never had this problem well I bet you're wrong. From women to men..to thin or big..this issue has poisoned the minds of pretty much most people I know. It's not hard to become gymtimidated... with all the meat heads in the free weights area..to the girls casually pedaling the elliptical with a full face of makeup on and a gallon of perfume..it's no wonder we are affected by this. If you have body image issues..low self esteem..poor confidence in yourself it makes it even harder.

Or maybe its not the people that intimidate you..its the machines..the shiny chrome that gleams practically blinds your eyes and when you get enough nerve to walk over to said contraption well..you have no freaking clue how to use it!!! You look all around you for a staff member at (insert your gym here) and gasp with annoyance as of course you cannot locate a single person wearing a uniform. You get mad at yourself and don't even want to try to figure out the machine.. for fear of looking stupid.. or you do attempt to figure it out and jam your finger on the darn thing out of anger because the stupid knob is stuck and the seat won't move and where do my arms go..and my legs need to go in that thing??? Yes these are all thoughts I too have dealt with.

I suffered from the worst kind of gymtimidation there is..THE FEAR OF EVERYTHING..The fear of seeing people I know..the fear of those darn machines.. the elliptical looked like a torture chamber and how the hell do my feet stay put...the barbie dolls on treadmills walking at a pace of 1.2 and waiting for a mea thead to hit on them..and the meat heads themselves.. not concerned with me at all or the endless sweat dripping off my arms and the breath I could never seem to catch..they were more interested in their own reflection in the mirror. Can you feel the frustration of me typing this??

Gymtimidation is beyond frustrating.. its a never ending cycle!! You feel bad about yourself and want to change so you think of the gym.. then you get to the gym and feel worse so instead you leave. How many of you have done this? Show of sweaty hands please..

I can't remember just why I changed my mind and bit the bullet one day.. well maybe it was the 10 month plateau I was in..I mean hell something had to change or I was about to throw in the towel completely. Thank god I got up enough courage to enter the double doors.. thank god I studied up on each machine I used.. never asking for help for fear of "bothering staff" ..because frankly at my most gyms I've attended.. the staff makes you feel like crap for asking. They are there to punch the clock and really don't ever seem to care about anything else..NOTE THIS IS MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE ONLY. Not naming any gyms in particular but its very rare to find someone that will help you with a smile.

After learning what each machine did and for what muscle group I worked them all to death for months.. until bam PLATEAU again.... but free weights??? Hell no!!! I will never go over there.. again here's a rant.. any gym I've ever been in has the worst free weight area.. not enough space..not enough weights..and don't get me started about squat racks and smith machines for there are NEVER ENOUGH. I still can't believe I know what the heck a squat rack even is..

But once again I knew I had to change so I started studying free weights..ROM... different moves for each muscle group and I watched countless videos on form and just prayed I was doing it right. I had my headphones on and sweat running down my face that day I finally conquered that fear of the free weight area which to this very day is still there.. I still have butterflies in my stomach when I enter it..no matter the time of day or day of week. Even when by now I pretty much see the same faces each morning when I go.. we wave to eachother...im comfortable there but I still know I'm just a visitor and that I will always be anxious about it.

Nobody is perfect..everyone has insecurities.. EVERYONE. That muscle bound pre workout jacked up guy lifting in the squat rack (NOTE MOST ANNOYING THING EVER) .. hates how his biceps bulge in weird places and never thinks his job is done.

That chick with fake eyelashes on and a boatload of Jadore by Dior doused in her workout clothes is afraid you can see the cellulite on her ass as she pedals slowly on the elliptical. She even looks down as she leaves the gym for fear of making eye contact with someone that will see how weak she is.

What's my point with all this? Screw being gymtimidated.. put in your ear buds and bust it out.. does making a better body for yourself hang out with routine? Nope.. Does growing stronger and healthier live with routine and know her well? Nope.. But getting healthier..building your confidence level.. getting stronger and feeling good all around..that lives and breathes with change.

Pre -workout snack ideas

If you have done your research as I have you will often find so many different answers on this subject..and what does to much info do? Confuse the heck out of you!! Myself included!! Some people don't like to have a snack before working out and that's fine..but for me..I gotta eat!!! I work out so hard that if I hit the weights without a small snack first I'm screwed..and extremely shaky. You've got to have energy to have an effective workout, so let your pre-workout snack help you push yourself to do your best. What works for you the best will depend on when you eat your snack as well as any stomach sensitivity issues you have, but a good rule of thumb is make your snack a mix of mostly carbs and a little bit of protein for exercise success. Here are a few pre-workout snack ideas that do just that!

• apple slices with almond or peanut butter (perhaps my fave)
• protein smoothies (so many recipes on pinterest)
• steel cut oats in a cup with bananas
• bananas/rice cake/peanut or almond butter
• hummus and celery/carrot sticks
• hummus and ezekiel bread
• trail mix (try not to buy any that's loaded with salt
• plain greek yogurt with blueberries/raspberries/bananas
• hard boiled eggs
• protein bars ( I prefer kind and Quest bars)

Everything's alright now..now that the weights gone..said no girl ever

The weight though it was hard..has all been shed.. those fat jeans lay in a heap on the floor..with your insecurities so you think..SO YOU THINK. This coming from a girl that since the age of 8 never felt  good..never felt good enough..never looked like the other little girls that played outside in their lush yards in upstate New York. The other little girls that played sports and had every boys attention. I still remember as a child looking out my bedroom window which faced a park..watching little kids play and wishing I could do those things. Of course I could do them..but I didn't want to. I would rather sit in my room listen to music and devour whatever treats I stuffed in my pockets from the kitchen. I would sit and be miserable always wishing always hoping.

This grew worse as the years tumbled forward..as the scale climbed higher and higher and I just settled with being the funny fat chick. You all know by now that I lost a lot of weight more so than most. I remember being excited with each number falling off the scale..I remember thinking I can't wait until I feel beautiful. I can't wait for it!

But then you reach your goal and it smacks you in the face.. you still feel those insecurities.. you still wished you were smaller than your friends when in reality you were. If only you could've seen that..if only you could've seen that you did do great things..that you did reach  great heights! Weight loss starts with our appearance but I am here to tell you that even a girl that weighs 115 pounds still feels as fat as the girl that weighs 215 pounds.

I preach this as I try and teach myself a new way of thinking.. when you grow up thinking you aren't good enough or beautiful..and then you realize at the age of 33 you still feel this way..it sure is hard to change. But you must..you must Caitlin..you must to every woman out there that doesn't feel good inside. I promise you that weight coming off won't change that way of thinking..we have to REBUILD. We have to talk about our issues..not tuck them away just for them to keep resurfacing..we have to build healthy relationships with ourselves first before we can even begin to expect great things.

This year I am rebuilding..I am adding in new flooring and a roof..I will add curtains to my gorgeous windows and pressure wash the outside..I will fix every crack I can find and slowly learn to accept that no matter what my size is..I have something to offer.

Online personal training..the wave of the future?

So just what is online personal training? How does it work? Will it work for me? What do I need to do? I can't afford to buy tons of equipment! Why shouldn't I just hire a trainer in person? These are questions I'm asked on a daily basis..and I wanted to just get it all out there for the zillions of emails I see each day.

What is online personal training?

I'm sure other trainers have different programs offering online training but we are here today to discuss my online training program which basically needs very little to be attained. Personal trainers that meet with you face to face (I do that as well) can do the very same thing with you online and in person. Sessions typically last 30 minutes or 60 minutes depending on your goals and budget. But regardless of  how you are trained you can get the very same results just by giving it your all!

How does online training work?

Online training with me is done live using a webcam..mine cost 8$ at Walmart.. yes there are many different options for cams but I am cheap and it works just as good as the more expensive brands! I let all my online clients know they will need two things.. a webcam and SKYPE. Skype is a free download (no viruses) that allows you to either call or video call with people all over the world. Way back when I lived in Europe I skyped my friends and family everyday! So I (skype call) my clients with my cam..I see them and they see me..its fantastic!

I'm also able to group call up to 25 different people across the globe..hence the reason I'm now offering online fitness classes!

After I speak with my clients on the phone for a great Q&A sesh to ask you questions such as..medical conditions/limitations..nutrition details..current stats and future goals then we pick your schedule and I then send a boatload of info to their email. Training assessment info...medical disclaimers...and all of my clients receive my clean eating plans/recipes/meal prep guides and shopping lists..as I am certified in fitness nutrition with NASM as well.

How does it work?

Just like when you train with someone in person..there's the warm up..the exercise..the cool down..the stretch.. in the privacy of your own home. 90% of my clients do this with me in their pajamas as obviously the convenience is you not having to leave your home and kids to train. We meet at our scheduled times and kick ass. Every other week we get new stats entered which I keep track of and the results if my clients follow everything I send them..are amazing.

Will it work for me?

Different things work for different people.. and that's just the way it is. Do I have every client I have ever had signed up..still in my roster? Nope.. but the clients that have stuck around absolutely love it and are seeing great results. Why it doesn't work for some people usually is NUTRITION..and I find this with clients I see in person as well. Nutrition is a huge commitment that not everyone is ready for and I completely get that as I was that person now 5 years ago. But also our society wants quick fixes and since the media is so good about talking about weight loss like it happens overnight sometimes it makes my job harder. You just have to remember how long it took you to put the weight on and realize that it will not come off that fast..and if it does its more than likely not being done the healthy way. All I can say is if you've ever considered personal training..go for it. If you find  the right trainer it's very worth it. You can learn a lot to help propel you to new heights!

What do I need to do? Do I need to buy tons of equipment?

Really not much is involved other than a webcam and downloading skype.. Do I suggest my clients buy tons of expensive equipment? Nope.. Honestly body weight exercises are some of the very best..but I always have a set of dumbbells and resistance bands/loops on hand and some of my clients choose to purchase them or hunt down thrift stores to find them.

Why shouldn't I just hire a trainer in person?

Well you can if you choose to and I'm sure that trainer will be great for you! But the whole reason online training is fantastic is because..

You can take it anywhere..as long as you have an internet connection you can do it! I train clients from Florida to California..from Ireland to Dubai. Yes the time zones are insane and can be harder to schedule but my whole point is..everyone can do this.

It's cheaper..a LOT CHEAPER than hiring a trainer in person. Monthly plans giving you more workouts than just one session with a trainer can cost the exact same. It's a no brainer really..You have to be willing to follow the plan but if you do the results can be transforming.

It's harder to quit.. my clients have access to me 24/7 via phone/text/email/social media.. you should see my text logs..pictures of food..before/after photos..its amazing and I count my blessings each day. But if you see a trainer at your local gym I guarantee you will not have that kind of access to them and if you do.. then stick with them! My clients have access to me 24 hours a day whether they make a huge nutrition mistake or just need me to walk them thru not having that last cheat meal.

It's suited to everyone..tailored to your needs.. whether you are 350 pounds or 150 pounds..I work with them all. I don't do the same things with each client because of course Jane at 350 cannot do what Michelle can at 150. I understand because I've been there.

It’s not your fault if the personal trainers in your area are incompetent or not right for you. In venturing online you can find the right type of trainer. And if this person happens to be 100 or even 1,000 miles away, then online personal training becomes the logical choice.

Another great point is that you're not shackled to a massive contract..my clients are month to month and if they can't afford it or have vacations to go to..I work with them the best way possible. I know most trainers/gyms will only take on new clients with a commitment package or contract and nobody likes contacts..nobody!

You can learn everything you need to before you even hit the gym..by the time you finish online training you'll be a pro using most equipment a gym offers you.

So all in all this isn't a gimmicky salesy way for me to try and hook you as a client..I just wanted to get the facts out there..because I know if I had the opportunity back when I started my journey..I totally would've jumped on the online training bandwagon.

If you have any questions about online personal training..just ask!

WOD (Medicine Ball workout)

I am big on change.. I cannot stand being bored with workouts..so I research and try new things constantly. One thing I love to do while I'm training clients and if I'm working myself out..is using equipment. I am fortunate enough now to have an abundance of neat stuff and the medicine ball is no exception. I still remember seeing it and holding one and thinking.. ok so its a basketball just heavier what's the big deal?!

There are so many different things you can do with a medicine ball!! I absolutely love using these! I purchased the ones I have (all different weights) on Amazon..I've included a link for ya. But you don't have to purchase one if you can't..you can use a heavier dumbbell in place of the med ball or honestly even cans of soup or just something heavier!! Try out my workout above.. don't forget to warm up.. in between sets do soldier kicks and jumping jacks to really get your heart going! Cool down and stretch and have a fantastic day!!!! Gold's Gym 6 lb Medicine Ball

Also below are some different exercises you can do with the ball..and get a total body workout!

Recipe of the week...Turkey Apple Hash

So...I know I'm no Martha Stewart... but after making this last night I am in love and pretty much want to hug myself! Turkey Apple Hash... aka heaven. I thought I would love it and I did. So here is the yummy delicious recipe! 1 lb. ground turkey 3 apples, chopped up 1/2 onion, chopped up 1 tsp cinnamon 1/2 tsp all spice salt and pepper and any other seasonings you like, to taste (optional: chopped roasted sweet potatoes)

Super easy! You just cook the turkey and onion in a skillet over medium heat. Then add the apples and spices and stir. It is heavenly, and it smells divine too! If you add a little spiciness to the dish, it is the perfect combo of sweet, salty and spicy. Sauteed in a skillet and I plan on reheating it for breakfasts/lunches because it truly was so good. I hope you enjoy it!!

To GOFUNDME or not... that is the question

Call me controversial if you must but I'm the one with the skin!! I started a gofundme account over the Summer but then chickened out and decided not to share it with my fans on facebook..but after reading the Half My Size issue of People magazine that comes out bi-annually I had to give it a try for real this time. What inspired me? Well after visiting with countless surgeons and being told astronomical prices from 15000 and up... I happened to buy the magazine and read an incredible story. The story was so much like mine its crazy! Big chick loses 200 lbs..just like me.. gets an interview with People magazine (hey I've been trying to get in there for 2 years now) her story was so inspiring.. she too has a facebook fan page much like mine but with way more fans. They all donated for her surgery on a gofundme account and then a surgeon just so happened to be reading People and read her story. He is now doing the surgery Pro Bono and seems like a really nice surgeon. Don't worry I've emailed him too..lol! I will continue to email him countless times until I get an answer. One day I will get that surgery!!

I started repping the gofundme account a week ago and so far I'm at 455$.. I still feel its wrong somehow asking others for donations but I know if those same people needed me to..I would do the same. I am blessed beyond words for the fans that I have and I count my blessings each day!

Strong backs are super important.. sexy back workout included

After you're finished reading this blog post.. try my workout..hope you can see it on the photo!!! Do a warm up first for about 5 to 10 minutes to get your muscles warm and pliable!

Did you know that more than 80% of Americans experience back pain at some point?? That number is insane!!! The back muscles are more important than people tend to give them credit for. Most people focus on the arms and chest when they go to the gym because that's what society portrays to be the most important. Well the truth is every muscle is important and you should exercise all your muscles! But back to the back. We use our back muscles all the time from lifting objects, to standing, to sitting, and even to coughing and sneezing! Think about what would happen if you had some thing stuck in your throat and you where to weak to cough it up! I know it's drastic but it is realistic!

Having a strong back will also make your day to day life easier and less strenuous. There are three muscle groups in the back, the Latissimus Dorsi, Erector Spinae, and Rhomboids. The Latissimus Dorsi muscles are found on the sides of the back and are used for flexibility and extension for the upper body as well as rotation. The Erector Spinae is known mainly as the lower back but it actually spans from the buttocks to the neck. The Erector Spinae is used for flexibility and extension for the upper body as well as rotation. The Rhomboids are made up of minor and major muscles that go between the shoulder blades to help with rotation, elevation, and retraction of the shoulder blades. The back is worked through exercises like seated rows, bent over rows, kneeling bench dumbbell one arm rows, dead lifts, and reverse fly's.

So as you can see, the back muscles should be a regular part of your training plan. Not working the back will lead to injury and obviously back problems! The main reason most people end up having back problems is due to the fact that they neglect the back muscles and go on working their arms and chest. Then they end up hurting their back doing something as simple as kneeling over to pick up their keys they just dropped on the floor! Also remember to avoid sitting too much throughout the day, sitting is terrible for your back and it is something we all do too much!

Make it a priority each day to stretch your back as well as the rest of your body to build flexibility and be active! Get some good circulation throughout your body and you will start to see the improvements in tight or sore muscles. It's all about living an active healthy lifestyle and maintaining a good amount of flexibility. Always warm up and stretch before working out as well as cooling down and stretching after working out. Also learn to stretch your back in the morning before your feet even touch the ground. This will help with back soreness and tension a lot!

Below are some fantastic stretches you can do for your back and neck to help strengthen the muscles.

Fit client of the month!

Because  I'm so proud of each and every one of my clients I've decided to run a feature on a client that has been kicking ass on the monthly. They talk me up all the time so it's really the least I can do to return the favor!  

Meet Emily..

Emily has lost 68 pounds since we first started training and I am super proud of her!!! 272 pounds and miserable was exactly what she said to me during our initial consultation. Chronic knee pain and a severe addiction to Mountain Dew and potato chips..an emotional eater very much like myself..I was excited to get started!

Emily has been following my clean eating meal plan and has one cheat meal per week..Emily currently trains with me online 4 days a week for 30 minutes and has two rest days. She literally has not lost an ounce of motivation since we began and her drive makes me jealous! I have yet to see her falter..but something tells me it's because she has a gorgeous wedding dress to fit into!

Emily has noticed a significant change in her sleeping habits as well..massive insomnia concerns and her knee pain only comes around once in a while. She no longer has to take her hypertension medicine and is now addicted to water. Emily is just like you and me but she set goals.. big and small and is not stopping until she meets them..but she has no superpowers..and if Emily and I can do this..anyone can!!! Way to go Emily!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

For more transformations and testimonials check under the tab listed (transformations/testimonials)

Perfection = boring

s Go hard go hard go hard..get results results results..but what good are results if they don't satisfy the need.. what good are they? What's the freaking point of working out hard and eating healthy and doing everything you can to look your best..when you never reach your opinion of your best. PERFECTION = BORING.. remember those words ladies!!

We are all guilty of wishing..wanting..hoping to be something that is so utterly impossible..we are all guilty of wishing we were perfect. In September after visiting with the 4th surgeon about receiving skin removal surgery I felt as if I nailed my own coffin shut. It's hard not to get upset even talking about it..but when the surgeon stated there was basically nothing else I could do ON MY OWN to have the skin removed..I became sad/depressed/pissed off/hating life.. I became my worst enemy. After working out so hard for 4 years and being strict with my clean eating I threw it all away at that very moment.

I cried in my car.. so upset that no amount of research on new weight training routines and no amount of saying no to sugar would ever be good enough. I hated my skin..I hated my skin more than ever. That skin pissed me off (and still does) ..sometimes I thought to myself that I wished I was big again. To never have to worry about a gift partially unwrapped yet being completely unable to finish ripping the gift wrap off. I guess that's the best way I can explain it. Or for my fellow foodies out there.. a big piece of cake but knowing you can only eat half that piece and sitting there watching the rest go bad.. the cake looses its moist deliciousness and becomes hard and crunchy..followed by mold on the icing. It's sad to watch it go and know you cannot do anything about it.

If I could go back in time and rewind I would never have gone to that surgeon that day..was he nice..yes of course. Was he knowledgeable of course.. but after pouring thru his clients before and after photos I became one bitter..jealous..pissed off chick. No amount of lettuce and iron would fix the ache inside. So I thought the hell with this..I'm going to just focus on my clients and quit focusing on me. What good was I if I couldn't give my clients the results of perfection.. maybe I can change their life and stop worrying about fixing mine. So that's just what I did..neglect. Neglected myself badly.. yeah I can use the holidays as an excuse (as most do and I have) and yeah maybe I can blame my new relationship and the fact that we dined out a lot during the "honeymoon phase".. but truthfully it's only my fault. These are all my decisions and my battle for perfection almost cost me everything.

Shows like The Biggest Loser.. or pretty much any weight loss magazine article..or infomercial out there give losing weight a bad name. If you don't hit your goal in short amount of time..and look good at the end..then you fail. But this is not true at all.. losing weight is a constant battle..even for me. It's taking it one day at a time..it's about making mistakes and Learning from them.. It's about realizing that what works for you may not work for the next person. We are all different..we are all unique..we are all human. Even Jillian Michaels has a cheat day..trust me I've checked!!!

When you lose a significant amount of weight..I don't care who you are you will be left with battle wounds..battle wounds that I've talked about being proud of but never really practiced what I preached. So now the teacher is being taught..being taught that even she has weak moments..just because I'm a personal trainer does not mean I am not going to fall on my face once in a while.. trust me I have to repeat that to myself over and over!!! But..baby steps...followed by proud strides..leaps and bounds. Each day is different no matter what. Some days are amazing but others will suck. It's about not letting it overcome you..it's about FINDING A BALANCE.. It's about still focusing on yourself when it's easier to focus on others instead. As a mom would for her family..trust me that your health is just as important and that you are not selfish for wanting good health!!

So maybe my ass jiggles when I walk..and my thighs are thick..but those thighs carried me far and will continue to still keep going for me..and who wants a bony ass after all? I think it was Sir Mix A Lot who said it best.. "you can do side bends or sit ups..but please don't lose that butt" .. Maybe your stomach is your trouble zone..but instead focus on something you love. I know I have a small waist and will embrase the large flap of skin that just won't go away..I'll ignore the blanket of skin that surrounds me if I'm swimming.. because I worked hard for that damn skin..every single day..and I worked hard for my bubble butt..that I can lift a lot with. Perfection consists not in doing extraordinary things..but in doing ordinary things extraordinary well (Arnauld Angelique)..

You and I were born to be real..we weren't born to be perfect.

The Today Show experience - The Joy Fit Club Induction

Well now that the dust has settled I can finally tell you all about my Today Show experience and really just how I got on the show in the first place.  

I submitted my story to The Today Show's Joy Fit Club about 6 months ago..I was contacted to be on the show in May and missed my chance by only a few minutes. I went from jumping up and down to contemplating a big bowl of ice cream with tears soaking my cheeks in a matter of 5 minutes..true story! But..I just knew I would get on there..just didn't know when. So each month I shot over a new email letting them know I was still interested in an appearance and I would also send new progress pictures.

For those of you not familiar with the Today Show on NBC..well you're crazy!! It's a great show of news..entertainment..current events and of course the weather. But there's a segment run on the show that I followed for years called The Joy Fit Club.  The Joy fit club.. named Joy after its founder Joy Bauer the nutrition and health expert for The Today Show and one of the nations leading in the nutrition field with a ton of certifications..tv shows and books under her belt. The show celebrates "members" handpicked by Joy for large amounts of weight loss..100 plus pounds or more.

Once chosen as a member to be on The Today Show you get to go on and show off your new figure and talk briefly..very briefly indeed.. on how you lost your weight. To be chosen as a member is an honor and it basically means you kicked butt and took names..and I for sure have done that.

I still remember what I was doing the day I received my second invite to the show. I had just finished training some clients and I happened to check my phone for emails and there it was... Are you still interested in being on our show? WELL YEAH OF COURSE!!!! I screamed and jumped around and then I quickly panicked..national TV??? Live??? Holy lord..I did not know if I could even do it!

After speaking with numerous producers and Joy's fantastic assistant Tina I was told that they would fly me up Sunday August 10th and then I would be on the air Monday August 11th before I return back home to Florida. A quick trip but one I didn't have to pay for and one that I wanted to take!!

I was told they wanted me to show a workout move to Kathie Lee and Hoda and that made me extremely nervous but I couldn't not do it! I was also excited to rep my book FAT CONFESSIONALS as I had just self published it and wanted to get the word out.

Fast forward to Sunday August 10th and I'm flying up to NYC nervous as ever with a few doses of Dramamine for my motion sickness. We landed after a very turbulent ride and I was shocked when I saw a limo driver waiting with a sign with my name on it. How surreal!!! They paid for me to stay in a nice hotel pretty much right by the studio and I was told to be at the studio at 9am to get ready for hair and makeup.

My parents live in NY currently and were lucky enough to book a room and come with me to the studio..thank god because I was so flipping nervous!!! I was shaking as I crossed the sidewalk over towards the studio..but so many people want this kind of opportunity so I just kept on walking.

After checking in with a guy that had a clipboard we entered right into the green room to wait for hair and make up and there was Olivia Wilde and Carson Daly..It's so odd to see people you watch on TV right up close in person..Carson was way taller than I thought he was and Olivia was even more gorgeous than she is on the big screen. I was shaking more now and eager to get it all over with so I could relax. My nerves were getting the best of me.. I met the other guy chosen to be entered into the Joy Fit Club..because they now induct two members at a time. He was very nice and appeared to be nervous too so I felt a little better.

Hair and make up time!! My favorite part of course..what girl doesn't like having someone do their hair and make up after all? I had to quickly get dressed in my workout gear behind a small curtain and then go back and wait until it was our time to enter the actual studio. Joy then entered the  green room and thank god..I remember turning to my mom and saying I was so scared and didn't think I could do it..Joy came right over hugged me and introduced herself and I immediately felt at ease.

Joy spent two hours with myself and my parents and really made our trip the best it was! She told me to rock it on the stage in front of the cameras and to just be myself. She grabbed my book from me and was eager to talk about it on camera.

We were told it was time to head to the studio and the knots in my stomach came back as I was getting microphones placed on me and we waited behind a curtain. I could hear Kathie Lee and Hoda talking on camera and then the producer came out to let us know we were going to be standing behind our before pics and where to stand when our names were called to enter on the stage.

I stood behind my photo and could see all these people standing behind me on the sidewalk looking in the window and waving..was I dreaming?? Was this all real? Did I really give myself a goal and actually accomplish it? I started to get tears in my eyes and then even more nervous that my mascara would run..but it was that very moment when I think I finally felt proud of myself.

You see im the kind of person always seeking approval and recognition and when I don't get it sometimes I feel dejected. I looked down at my feet which I do often to remind myself of the days when I could never see my toes because my stomach was always in the way. I clicked my heels together like Dorothy on the Wizard of Oz and then I heard CAITLIN FLORA come on out.

I walked out and did a little turn and shook hands with Kathie Lee and Hoda while Joy started telling them my story..but the segment goes so quick!! Two people to interview about their weight loss in 2 minutes flat.. I wished I had had more time to talk because it was like once I stepped out on that stage the nervous dissolved..completely gone. I just knew what to do and what to say.

And then just like that..it was over. The microphones were coming off and Joy was escorting me back to the green room and hugging me goodbye..she said if I ever needed anything to contact her and that she was so proud of me. I truly felt as if I met a great lifelong friend that really understand where I had been and where I am at now.

NBC was kind enough to give me a few hours of extra time before heading back Monday night..so that way I could hang out with my parents...shop and eat lunch. The weather was perfect and I was eager to be relaxed again.

I want to thank Joy Bauer for her being so kind to me and picking me to be on the show. Without her I know I wouldn't have been chosen. I also want to thank her assistant Tina that was so sweet and gracious during my phone interview that I felt at ease.

If you want to read Joy's bio and all about the amazing things she does check out her site!

http://www.joybauer.com/

Go big or go home

I cannot begin to tell you how many emails I get from ladies all over the world that ask me how hard they should be working..during their personal workout routines. In fact since I seem to get these emails daily I figured now would be the best time to address that popular question...

I remember seeing an interview on Entertainment Tonight a few years ago..the interview was with Jillian Michaels..a lady I just so happen to have a major girl crush on.  She has her haters but I am certainly not one of them. Anywho.. she was asked the very same question I am daily..how hard should we be working? Her answer was..if you can hold a conversation you aren't working hard. I remember seeing that interview and thinking..holy shit Im not working hard enough.

Just because I was hitting the gym everyday or kicking butt on my home workout dvd's didn't mean I  was working to my full potential. I would sweat but not profusely...I would never be out of breath after I was used to working out..it became a normal day in day out routine. Which is fine..IF YOU WANT TO HIT A PLATEAU. If you want to remain the same stay with your comfort routine..if you don't want to see results keep talking to your friend next to you on the treadmill..or answering your text messages..or checking in on facebook..or scrolling through your news feed..but if you do that those pants of yours will still be snug. You will still be out of breath from climbing out of your car and your eyes will still stare at the ground when you pass people.

Let's face it..we would all rather be partying with our friends or eating at a buffet than working out hard. But if you are going to bother working out..why not give it 100%? Whats the flipping point if you don't? If you have a large goal especially..you need to do this..you need to focus and kick the shit out of yourself in that gym. You need to ignore your phone and just be one with your music and your sweat. The more you procrastinate with your fitness the longer those goals will take you. So the choice is yours my friends.. why not go big instead of just going..why not be in the moment when its there..when you're there. Be persistent and remember why you started.. and give it your all day in and day out...because that's what I had to do..and you see where it got me!

Lemonade

I started my page on Facebook during a hard time in my life..February 2013 I was stuck and not getting anywhere. I was always the girl that wished she was someone else..always wanting another life..any life it didn't matter..but never my own.  I'm a sensitive person so I type this with tears in my eyes but just know they are genuine and happy tears that I cry.  

I'm not conceited nor cocky in any way but when I sit back and look at how much as changed for me not because of anyone else but myself I am amazed.  I'm amazed because I was never the person that said they would do something and then do it.  I would make excuses..sweep it under the rug or wait for "Monday" to come before I tried again. I was never ambitious or driven or motivated by anything unless it was food.  I was miserable in my skin and always wished I were someone else.  

I can't put my finger on what changed for me..because many of you have asked me.  But after years of failing at it..one day something finally clicked.  Finally it made sense to me that in order for me to be happy I had to work on not just the outside..but the inside.  I was so focused on my outer appearance I didn't realize that unless I fixed what was going on in my head and heart it would never work.

365 days ago I had no dreams of being a personal trainer let alone owning my own business doing so..I knew I could write but never thought I would have a book coming out. I didn't even know how to lift dumbbells properly this time last year.  When a friend of mine took me to the free weights area I freaked out and went to my "happy" place..the treadmill instead.

I started my page not thinking anybody in the world would ever pay attention to what the fat girl had to say.. but I had to write to get it all out because to be honest with you..I couldn't afford a therapist. Writing has helped me tremendously and of course I'm not perfect..nobody is..perfection is boring. I do have my moments of struggle..I do have my moments of insecurity..but so does everyone..and those moments are far fewer now than they ever were before. 

I turned what I considered my worst fault into my biggest triumph ...

I took lemons and I made lemonade..I set goals and I crushed them..and when I felt confident enough I started helping others. I could've sat on my ass and just let the world go on living without me..but if you have one life and that's it..then why not live it?? Why focus on the negative when you have the power to change it?  Why be the problem when you can be your solution??

365 days later.. I have the pleasure of having the best damn clients ever. Near and far..people Ive never met and people I see everyday..all listening to me and inspiring me daily while I inspire them.  It's crazy thinking that 2 years ago I walked on a treadmill inside a gym and watched a female trainer and literally thought to myself..I wish I could do that. Not even knowing that I would be.  This didn't just happen over night for me..I have marketed the shit out of myself and kicked my own ass each day.  I email non stop..I call anyone I can..and if someone can only do jumping jacks at 5am on a Sunday..by golly I will be right there doing it with them.

I didn't just lose weight and get lucky..I crawled bleeding to that damn finish line and let the sweat sting my cuts and bruises. I have been working my butt off in one way or another since I was living on my own at age 16. Day in and day out punching the clock..not knowing when I would have enough to get by..not knowing when the electric would be shut off or where I would be sleeping each night. These were daily worries for me..so when I sit here and say how did I get so lucky..while I do feel lucky I also feel I'm not.. because things didn't just all of a sudden go my way. I had to reach out and grab them..I had to make them happen.  I didn't ever just sit and wait for my life to change..I had to try new things until something finally worked.

What does this all have to do with weight loss?  It takes a special person to be able to lose weight..whether that be 20 lbs or 200 lbs like myself..it takes day in day out never giving up.  It takes going to bed at 10pm instead of midnight because you know you have to get up at the butt crack of dawn. It means never taking no for an answer..ever. It means being a champion even when you didn't come in first place.  It means patience and time and sweat.  It means being afraid of something and going for it anyway..it means being brave.  It means never giving up not ever.

It means taking those damn lemons and making lemonade.

It's time to live

I could see the red and blue flashing lights as soon as I turned onto the road heading to a training session..I debated on turning around and heading in a different direction but the trail I was headed to was near those flashing lights so I knew I had to drive past them. As my car moved closer I could see that this was serious..3 totaled cars at an intersection where the lights weren't working (again)..this tends to happen a lot here. So there I sat in my little white car inching up closer and closer to the accident and I was anxious to see the damage. The ambulance was blocking a lane and I then I saw it..a group of EMT and policemen trying to strap a man on a stretcher..the man covered in blood. I'm a sensitive person (i've always hated that about me) so I started crying like a baby..praying that the man on the stretcher would be ok.

I began to wonder what his life was like..did he have a family? A happy family? Did he live his life the way he wanted to? Had he accomplished everything he wanted to before this day? Or was he sad..lived alone..afraid to the things he always dreamt about and it hit me smack in the face.

An emotional wreck at a stoplight because of a wreck.. many of you do not know me personally but I'm guilty of sitting on the sidelines when it comes to many things. I'm guilty of loving routines and not stepping out of the box (not when it comes to fitness) but with everything else. I sat at that light for what felt like forever but I'm glad I did because I needed this moment of clarity.

It's been a rough few months but at the same time I know its for good reason..I am a different person inside and out. Not just the scale..the pant sizes..the seat belts that finally fit around my waist..I'm not different because I can see my  feet when I walk..though its nice..that isn't whats changed.

I appreciate life way more than I used to..I'm more of a go getter than I ever was before. I don't wait for things to happen I make them happen. But not with everything..until now.

So in the words of the great Tim McGraw I'm choosing to live like I am dying..though I'm not. I'm going to do everything I said I never would..things that scare the living shit out of me..things I never dreamt I would do..I'm going to say things I've never said because I know I need to. I'm done with all of that old life. I've grown into an amazing woman and I deserve to live my life the way anyone else should.

I've struggled so hard from a young age until now and it made me tough and strong..and thats great. But there is so much I want to do that I never could/would..but I will. When I said 2014 would be my year..I wasn't joking. So from now on each day I will do something that scares me..even if its small..because whats small to you may not be to me.

I don't want to end up on a stretcher covered in blood and think man oh man do I wish I had more time left..I wish I had done what I wanted to.

Life moves pretty fast..if you don't stop and look around once in a while..you might miss it- Ferris Bueller

How to get comfortable in the weight room

The weight room is a scary place..or so I thought like 99% of the people that will hopefully read this post.  With stacked meat heads all over the place and the smell of testosterone so thick in the air you can cut it with a knife..who the hell wouldn't be afraid??? But that really wasn't my hang up. Ya partially I would say it was but the majority of my fear was..dum dum dum... MY WEIGHT LIFTING FACE.. but seriously it was!!

I make the worst expressions when lifting heavy..I mean its a cross between hi I just sucked on a lemon and ouch I slammed my toe in the door. It ain't pretty. When I thought of the gym I thought of all the gorgeous girls walking around giggling..chewing gum..lipstick coating their lips..twirling their damn hair around their fingers as if this was a bar. Then I realized..well I want to be different. I want to come in here and just work my ass off then punch out and go home. I thought of it as a job..and that is what works for me!

Screw those stupid mean girls and meatheads..after you first enter the free weight area you get nervous..it still happens to me each day. But.. I bet it happens to many. After a while you start seeing the same faces over and over again and more importantly you see that everyone has a bad weight lifting face.. I mean when you lift something heavy of course you will have a grimacing look. It's because the shits hard!!! HELLO!!!

So push those fears aside..turn those tunes up and just try one set of something..ANYTHING. Just don't ignore going over there for fear..because that is where the magic is. The grass is greener on that side I can tell you!

DO I LOOK BULKY TO YOU???

Don't lift weights they said..you'll bulk up they said..well guess what...THEY LIED! Cardio queen..treadmill rat..elliptical junkie..yeah that was me. Hi my name is Caitlin and I was a former cardio addict. But when are stuck in a huge rut..you do your research. When you hit that wall you know changes have to be made. Plateaus are made to be broken. You do whatever the heck it takes to smash through the roadblocks and keep your car on the road. For me that was my workout routine. I was tired of fitness classes at the gym..tired of my workout dvd's at home..tired of that stupid treadmill that had every one of my hopes and dreams wrapped around it and it failed me. It failed me to continue my success and I knew I was going to quit. Once it gets boring I'm no longer interested. Weight loss gets boring..tedious as hell frankly..we all get impatient and look for that quick fix. When it doesn't come we feel dejected then choose to quit. I REF-- USE TO QUIT.

So I ignored what many said and decided to go to weights..throwing away every cardio routine in the trash and started to prepare for something bigger. I'm here to tell you to ignore what people say about weight lifting and women's bodies because its not true!!! I am living proof of that!!

The photos you are looking at above the before pics were taken in December 2013 and the after pics are from this past weekend July 2014. Pounds lost in the photos..ONE POUND. Do you get me? Size difference?? Black and white dress was a size 10..the dress I wore this weekend was a size 4. Thank you come again!! Enough obsessing over the scale..obsession of any kind is completely unhealthy and unrealistic. So ditch that crap and pick up weights instead!!!!!

Plan ahead and win..fail to plan and fail!

As I sit here inhaling the delicious aroma making its way down the hall from my kitchen to my living room I am reminded of a time when I never planned my meals..  

One of the keys in my continued success against my battle with the flab has been planning my meals ahead of time..or "meal prepping" which may seem trendy as of yet but I have been doing this for a year now and have been very pleased with my efforts.

My meal prepping "before" consisted of unwrapping a box of lean cuisines or smart ones..heating it up in the mic for however long the directions said..barely being able to stomach the nasty bland taste and praying to god I wouldn't be starving 30 minutes later..of course I always. That was all I did..it was simple quick and easy..and I knew the calories I would be inhaling therefore I felt "Reassured" that I was doing the right thing. Of course at 8pm when I was ravenous from barely eating anything all day that whole calorie counting goal blew out the window as I sat on my couch with a tub of JIF peanut butter (former addict).

Enter clean eating..which I've done now since February 2013..basically right after I created EATRUNLIFTREPEAT.. I read up and did my research on meal prepping. I was scared to death and SOOOOOOOO NOT a cook by any means. Cooking?? What the heck is that? How do I learn?? All I had ever mastered was the microwave..and baking cakes..not for anybody but for myself.

Off to the grocery store I went with cart in tow not having any flipping clue what I was doing but just "winging" it and praying I would do ok. I filled my cart with vegetables..meats..oats..and much more. Brought it home all excited and then I thought to myself..now what the heck do I do..

Trial and error people trial and error!!!! After a few attempts it finally made sense. Make it all at once (the stuff that doesn't go bad quickly of course)..and use tupperware to store it for the week! Genius!! It really is that simple! I promise you if you do it once a week you will see the time and money you save!

After all..soldiers don't enter battle without planning..parties aren't held without the food and guest list planned..weddings are planned..many things in life are planned. If you take the few minutes ahead to plan out your days meals it will also save your waistline.

Can't target trouble zones..think again

My thunder  thighs have always been the dread of my very existence...  

From my thighs rubbing together to the clapping sound they made when I even attempted to jog..I have absolutely detested that area and made a promise to myself that I would do whatever it takes to get some hot stems.  Researching glute/hamstring/quad workouts had almost become a part time job for me...each day logging on my laptop and searching throughout google and pinterest so much so that my head was spinning..all for the love of my legs.  The legs that have carried me so far in my life and yet they looked like they had never carried weight at all.  Back in October 2013 when I first started experimenting with weight lifting I never thought I would ever see progress with the stubby little blocks of legs that I wear daily..but I was so completely wrong.  I remembered reading an article though can't remember where it is to share it with you, that you cannot target "trouble zones". I'm here to tell you that is false.

Whether it be your abdominal area..the dreaded bat wings or your ass and thighs I am here to say you have the power to change it if you put the work in.  I started with the typical workouts adding in squats and lunges but spent more time correcting my form than anything before even Starting to add weights. I used free weights first and then worked my way up to using the SMITH MACHINE..an assisted machine that allows you to add weight to the bar but helps you lift it up. I become bored easily with workouts therefore I constantly change them..so that way I never stop.  The minute your workout grows boring chances are that's when you quit..because that was me.  If you do the same things over and over again you will never stay excited and never continue to see the changes you want.

My all time favorite move EVER is the deadlift.. So many variations..so many names for it and yet it literally works all the muscle groups I vowed to change.  My personal favorite deadlifts are stiff legged and Romanian..I live and die for these moves. Yes I am a gym junkie and you know what..I'm proud of it.  I still remember  the first time I was taken around the weights area..I still remember freaking out about it and going upstairs to the treadmills instead.

Every week I work my legs 3 days (rotating of course) and every 2 weeks I increase my weights. My deadlift weights hadn't increased in forever due to the bleeding ripped calluses on my hands..no gloves can ever help me hold up the barbell any better so therefore I do not wear them. But then magic happened..I changed my grip to a switch grip two weeks ago and have consistently upped my weights in the past 2 weeks.  I can now deadlift 200 lbs and I know I'm capable of lifting way more but I want to make sure my form is perfect so I don't throw out my back.  I start heavy and slowly decrease with each set (pyramid) and then I finish out with high high reps towards the end.

I love single legged deadlifts as well and have just started this using the barbell only (about 45 lbs) But I step up on a box with it and make sure I get as low as possible..even small little changes like this will guarantee results. Since adding in weighted deadlifts,lunges and squats I've gone down 2 pants sizes and shaved off so much cellulite I can't even begin to tell you.  My legs feel rock hard under the loose skin that's left and I'm hoping to get it all off..and if not I will go under the knife. I deserve to look fantastic for all the work I've done on these stems.

New and exciting

So many new and exciting updates to share with you..other than this site! Im about to take the fitness world by storm and giving up my desk job completely. Its a huge risk and I hope I'm not making a mistake!!

My Fat Jeans.